And How You Can Fix It

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Pursuing happiness for a lot of people is like chasing after the wind. The more you run after it, the more it also go away.

Playing in the background are the invisible hands of Hedonic Treadmillwhich explains our tendency to quickly return to a relatively stable level of happiness, despite major positive events or life changes.

So, while it’s probably right that money, physical pleasure, or social status can make us happy — they do so only for a while. And like a never-ending cycle, we left dissatisfied, wanting for more.

Well, this is not a dead-end though. Psychologists…


Unveiling the “Magic Trick” that underlies long-lasting behavior

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Photo by Jonathan Borba on Unsplash

2021 is on; resolutions are spreading all over the maps. The goal is clear: you want to kick-start a new habit.

Anyway, it’s easy to fall off the streaks, so you don’t want “just to start “ — you want to persist. And let me tell you, the statistics are daunting:

81 to 92 percent of New Year’s Resolutions are failures.

I feel you, no-one wants to stumble upon the same stone. In a moment, I’ll show you four questions to help you design a habit that sticks.

These questions emerge from dozens of research around how habits are formed…


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Photo by Joshua Ness on Unsplash

See I’ll give ya no bull

And leave this when ya ain’t fit the title. Cause it won’t make any use otherwise.

But if it is

Then follow my instructions properly

I know what ya feeling right now

Ya mind is out of control

Ain’t no solution fit, cause ya no need no any

This is no time to be rationale

But it is to take action, so, do it:

Open ya frickin phone

Set ya timer for 15 minutes

And RUN !!!

RUN!!! With Ya Foot.

Run!!!

Ain’t no give a damn with ya outfit

Run with ya pajamas, run with ya suit…


And how to be aware of it

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Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash

I’m a lover when it comes to humanity. But a blind love is a foolish love, so it’s important to know that humans came with an ugly side:

We are selfish by nature.

Of course you never hear a political candidate saying, “Vote for me so I’ll have power over you,” or a friend telling, “Let me help you so you’ll help me back in the future,” — selfish motives are tucked away on the back of the mind, waiting to make a move whenever needed.

And it’s not limited only to “bad” people after all, this is the game…


And how to find it within life

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Humans are curiosity machines. We ask why, we ask what, how and who — all in search of plausible answers, the one that sparks within our intellectual entity.

Stems from which is a question that I found ultimate:

“What is the Purpose of Life?”

This question is tricky — in part — because it confers two types of meaning.

The first meaning deals with seeing life from the outside: What is the purpose of our biological life and its consciousness? How does it matter in the face of stars, galaxies, and whole existence?

This type of question can be well…


But you can replace it instead

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Photo by Marlon Lara on Unsplash

Has it ever appeared to you that life is so blue that nothing can save you but a bottle of alcohol? Or have you experienced — amidst your abstinence — a mystifyingly seductive presence, whispering: “Take those cigarettes, come on, just this once!”

Every now and then, we know how dreadful an addiction could be. Call it porn, alcohol, or cigarette; all came with similar properties. They give temporary relief, despite miseries in the long run.

And for long, we’ve been told that the best way to end addiction is to stop doing it. So we strain ourselves — summoning…


Essential aspects we tend to overlook

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Photo by Road Trip with Raj on Unsplash

Human beings are fans of stories.

As suggested by a renowned psychologist — Dan McAdams — that people like to provide their lives with unity and purpose by actively constructing the narratives of the self.

Some like to see themselves as an entrepreneur who’s in a quest to solve world’s problems, some as an artist who’s ready to inspire, for several others it can be as simple as a parent who strives for little one’s happiness.

Everyone dedicates their life to fulfill their story. We’re all engaged in a pursuit, the pursuit of idyllic condition, the pursuit of happiness.

To…


A scientific approach to deal with an overthinking mind

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Photo by Aarón Blanco Tejedor on Unsplash

Remember that night when you were sitting alone in your room? The day had been restless, so it was nice to finally home.

You sat in quiet, allowing only breath to noise. But yet, you felt hell no silence, since the real conversation was attained somewhere between the skull, muttering:

“It’s no use trying. Things will never work out for me.”

“Oh, no. Why did I say that? What a fool. It’ll ruin everything.”

“Something’s going to go wrong. I can feel it.”

You called some of your friends, only to heard them saying, “Come on, it’s not like that…


A deep dive into the core of our nature

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Photo by Hennie Stander on Unsplash

“Ain’t get too drunk, you’re going to have a meeting this morning!”

“Stop Netflixing too much, ain’t you have something more productive to do?”,

“Cut your sugar, ain’t you want that squares upon your abs?”

For long, we know the notion about keeping things in moderation, that anything too much is not good. But for long also we knew, after all, we would pick the “wrong” yet intuitive path — even when we do realize the regrets which might come afterward.

Type for any personal development tips you want (How to…

Bandoro Gunarso

Junior Doctor, Writer, live in Bali. Human behaviour and Well-being enthusiast. Hit me up at bandorogunarso@gmail.com

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